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John MacCord
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Seeking Relief for My Soul!
O God! Refresh and gladden my spirit. Purify my heart. Illumine my powers. I lay all my affairs in Thy hand. Thou art my Guide and my Refuge. I will no longer be sorrowful and grieved; I will be a happy and joyful being. O God! I will no longer be full of anxiety, nor will I let trouble harass me. I will not dwell on the unpleasant things of life.
O God! Thou art more friend to me than I am to myself. I dedicate myself to Thee, O Lord.
-- 'Abdu'l-Bahá
I was raised a Southern Baptist in churches with a great deal of discussion and teaching about the second coming of Jesus. I became more active as a teenager after my family's move to Albuquerque, NM and was baptized on my birthday, 5 May, in 1963 (it just worked out that way). I had always been and remain curious about the nature of God and the meaning of life. Within my extended family we had Presbyterians, Catholics, Congregationalists, Methodists and at least one agnostic. Expanding into friends of the family we had even more diversity. I found it very difficult to believe that of all these competing religions that only one was right and if you didn't pick correctly, you were going to Hell.
I truly questioned not only the goodness of God but even the existence of God after my mother's death at age 40 after a long struggle with emphysema. I went exploring.
I had joined the
Army in 1964 and found myself at the Defense Language Institute at the Presidio
of Monterey, California, studying Burmese. Language study at DLI is brutally
unforgiving. Each day of class is the equivalent of a week in a college level
course. Class schedule was three hours in the morning, a two hour period to
take care of personal business, eat lunch, and study, and another three hours
of class in the afternoon. Evenings were tied up with from one to three hours
of study. Burmese is a four (?) toned language with a written script descended
from the Indian Pali script. You had to learn to handle four tones and a
non-Latin based script.
One
day, standing in formation just before the afternoon session, I was next to a
big, tall private with pamphlets hanging out of his pocket. I pointed out the
pamphlets to him and said that he should put them some place else. He hauled
out the pamphlets and asked me "have you ever heard of the the Bahá'í Faith?"
Well, as a matter of fact, I had. Back when I was eight years old my parents had invested in a set of World Book encyclopedias. I had started reading those volumes at "A" and worked my way through to "XYZ." I had periodically reread each volume as well and used the set for research purposes in a variety of studies. So, I remembered seeing "Bahá'í." But the entry was rather, well, encyclopedic.
So, Tom Schreck, for that was his name, invited me to my first Bahá'í fireside (or introductory talk) over in Carmel. Three months later I decided I wanted to be a Bahá'í. But it didn't take.
I spent the next
eleven years verifying my decision through reading a lot of books on different
religions. In August 1976 I rediscovered the Faith and began study again under
the tutelage of Charles and Conchita Ioas in Alexandria, Virginia. By October
1976 I decided that I really did want to be a Bahá'í and re-enrolled in the
Faith.
Being a Bahá'í provides me
with a structure to my life that is quite fulfilling. I am actively encouraged
to study the writings of the major figures of the Faith, a steady output
covering over 77 years of revelation and exposition. Bahá'u'lláh taught that all
religions are originally from God and all are equally valid. However, over time
man has changed those religions and added things that God never intended and
God finds it necessary to periodically send a new messenger, whom Bahá'ís call
a Manifestation of God, to bring man back to God's religion. This solved my
need to acknowledge the legitimacy of diversity in religious beliefs. Bahá'u'lláh
also taught that men and women were equal. Abdu'l-Bahá, His son, chosen
successor and expounder of His Teachings, taught that men and women are like
the wings of a bird. That if the bird's wings are not equally strong and beat
in unison that the bird will not fly. Bahá'u'lláh taught that science tells man
who, what, when, where, and how. Religion tells us why.
The last twenty years have been a spiritual struggle on many occasions. I've had to deal with a former spouse who was severely mentally ill. At times her situation and the impact on our family seemed more than I could bear. But the Faith teaches that "these (mental) illnesses have nothing to do with our spirit or our inner relation to God." This helped a great deal in helping me cope with my then wife. Whatever she did to herself under the stresses of mental illness would not affect her relationship with God. Sometimes I thought God is just dumping on me, but I know that God never gives us more than we can take. The spiritual path is rocky, but worth the trouble.
Over the intervening years I've served in a number of administrative positions in different parts of the country and in Japan.
Years ago I prepared a brief study on The Bahá'í Faith in Prophesy for a formal proclamation event. Since then I've given the same talk with some modification a number of times. Here it is for your information.
copyright 2005 by John S. MacCord, Jr.